Safety

If you went to college, perhaps it went something like this. You picked out a handful of schools to apply to - the ones you thought you'd have a pretty good chance of getting in, your no-way-in-hell (Princeton for me), and your safety. Your safety being the sure-thing in case all else failed so you'd have at least one college you could be certain would want you.

And so in dating, in the pursuit of a date, in the pursuit of being more "approachable", it is not such a stretch to categorize a potential suitor as a safety. The one your friend told you about that kept asking about you, the one who always chatted you up, the one who invited you out with his friends and who lingered as you said your goodbyes. Maybe he wasn't someone you ever considered as anything more than a friendly guy. And if you thought about it, maybe he wasn't someone who had the qualities you were necessarily looking for. But you were rusty at dating, and he seemed kind and funny. And you were on a quest to be more assertive, to be bold and brave. But in this case, you could play it safe too - he was into you, girl. Your move. Play the safety.

I got denied by my safety.

It's the sheer body blow to the ego that cripples you. You were my safety! My safety!